


Now I Can't Stand to Be Alone

by eringilbert



Category: Saw (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Self-Harm, please be careful okay?, seriously guys huge trigger warning, unmentioned but amanda is a lesbian and lynn is bi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-03-03 04:03:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13333095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eringilbert/pseuds/eringilbert
Summary: Lynn was prepared for accidents, people coming in with a bone sticking out and the like. She was used to surgeries both successful and not, the tears of joy and sorrow that followed.Lynn, however, was not prepared for what she found outside of the hospital and in her own home.





	Now I Can't Stand to Be Alone

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so lets just pretend for a second that the events in the film never actually happened and Lynn met Amanda in a healthy way that didn't involve her getting kidnapped and blackmailed into curing cancer. 
> 
> We good? Good.
> 
> I was inspired by this equally heartbreaking and lovely piece by Ellu on their art blog [http://tuherrus.tumblr.com/post/169339050307/tell-me-where-it-hurts]. It really moved me for personal reasons and actually got me out of a really bad writer's block. 
> 
> Title is from "Perfect Places" by Lorde. I don't own these characters (but if I did, that'd be great so hmu Wan and Whannell)

Lynn had perhaps the worst day of her entire life. Flu season was proving to be quite the bitch this year, flooding the hospital with people of all different backgrounds and varying degrees of sickness. It grew to be so intense that surgeons such as Lynn had to help the nurses and general doctors control the situation. 

"I swear to god, if one of those people gets me sick, I will NEVER help out Porter again," she said out loud so her car's Bluetooth system picked it up.

"I feel you, sis," her coworker Deborah said. She was the most dependable nurse that Lynn had ever worked with. "Unfortunately, he probably has the power to fire us if we refused."

"Oh, I know for a fact that he has that power! Not going to stop me though!" Lynn chuckled. She turned the corner and found her apartment building. "K, I'm pulling in now. Have a good night, Deb!" she replied. The two exchanged goodbyes and soon the Bluetooth was disconnected per usual at this time. She parked the car and laid in the driver's seat for a few seconds, trying to decompress before going inside. Amanda hated seeing her stressed or annoyed when Lynn came home. Amanda came home much earlier, working at an addiction center where she used to receive treatment. She almost never complained about her job; she loved it. Quite the contrast from Lynn's complicated relationship with her own job. 

After Lynn entered the blood-red lobby and greeted the doorman, she hit the button for the elevator. She was eager to get upstairs and to just be with her beautiful, amazing fiancee. Lynn looked down at the simple ring; a silver band with a singular diamond in the middle that sometimes appeared to be as old as time itself. She emerged from her thoughts when the elevator dinged and the familiar flower wallpaper and the replicated Monet painting of her floor's hallway greeted her once again. It didn't take long for Lynn to find their apartment. She unlocked the door, loudly saying "HEY BABE" to catch the attention of her beloved Amanda. 

No answer.

Lynn set the keys into the bowl on the kitchen's island and said, "Amanda, I'm home!" Still no answer. What was going on? 

The surgeon set down her bag and walked toward the bedroom. Everything looked normal, their bed still tucked in from when Amanda made it this morning. She turned towards the bathroom. A light was shining through the small crack on the bottom of the door. Lynn smiled; she must've just not heard her. She grabbed the door handle and slowly turned it, opening the door as carefully as she could in order to ensure a good surprise. She eventually opened it and found her lover's face reflected from the corner and into the mirror, but no words came out. 

Amanda, her strong and passionate Amanda, was sitting on the toilet cover and wiping a blood-soaked tissue across her thigh. 

Oh no. 

"Mandy?" Lynn softly said. Although her tone was light, it was enough to startle Amanda. 

She jumped from the toilet seat and immediately tried getting control of the door. "Get out, Lynn," she kept repeating. "Get out, get out, GET OUT!" Lynn resisted, her medically notorious grip finding a new purpose outside of the hospital. "Let me in, PLEASE," she retaliated. The two battled for control of the door for a few more seconds before Amanda gave up, collapsing again onto the toilet seat in frustrated and painful sobs. 

Lynn stepped inside and immediately knelt down to face her fiancee. She put her hand on her cheek, softly wiping the tears away from Amanda's face. "Mandy, just tell me where it hurts, okay?" she asked calmly. Amanda's sobs failed to be soothed. Lynn straightened up slightly and slowly embraced her. With her arms in a loose embrace across the other woman's body and tears dampening her shirt, Amanda carefully calmed down. 

"You're okay, you're safe, you're okay," Lynn whispered into her ear. Amanda believed her; Lynn was her sanctuary, her beacon, her rock. She hasn't let her down yet, and she certainly isn't at the moment. 

Amanda moved her head from Lynn's shoulder to her forehead. They touched ever so slightly, smiling as they took in each other and their minds raced of the past, present, and future. The two women exchanged a small, quick kiss, Lynn trying to be as delicate as possible. 

"Come on, get dressed, and we'll talk," Lynn said as she stood up. "I'll make some hot chocolate, if you want some." 

Amanda chuckled. "You know me so well," she replied, her voice still a little groggy from the crying. Lynn nodded and outstretched her hand, smiling as Amanda took hers and began walking back into the bedroom with her.

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: yamaguchinred (although i might make a separate saw/horror sideblog idk yet)


End file.
